It Came From a Vending Machine: Real Heroes! Real Horror?

Just because Halloween has passed us by, that doesn't mean you can't be scared stiff by your local vending machine offerings.  What is it this time?  Cartoon characters with gooey globs of paint dripping from every conceivable inch?  Maybe razor-sharp flash-covered plastic things, just begging to use up your last Band-Aid?  Or maybe some stickers, squashed between some cardboard, just to instantly remind you how uncool and out-of-fashion your choice immediately was?  Actually, none of those really, as this one is maybe the least scary this series has ever seen.

Introducing, Real Heroes, not to be confused with other imitators apparently.  These soldiers, in various classic poses and army camouflage color-ways, are a modern re-imaging of classic army men mini-figures with updated molds and weapons.  And the first thing you can notice and the thankfully exclusion of those hideous figure bases of the classics.  These, balanced more evenly, stand on their own, in every pose.

Pulling away from it's classic past and its differences from the hard thin plastic figures, what do these offer in the way of classic, purist, keshi nonsense?  You know, what does someone like me want to know about these guys?  For one, paint application on these are very minimal.  Small dashes over the hands and face are generally all that cover these, which allows the dessert, forest, snow, or night-time camo to really be the focal point.  Another positive point is the damn-near perfect feel and flexibility of the material used to mold them.  Surprisingly not poured in a super-hard plastic, recycled from bleach bottles and trash bags, I resist to use the term perfect when describing the amount of firmness these guys have.  Instead of being too hard and brittle or too soft and squishy, these mirror classic keshi minis in hard rubber feel without going too far in either direction.  The only significant knock I would have against these guys are the size and scale.  Like the monkeys, mini-ninjas, and other things we've found lurking in vending machines, these too stand only roughly an inch tall.  For a couple quarters, I suppose that's fine, but when talking about whether you should be interested or not to collect the whole set, this might be a deal-breaker, if you're interested in a certain flow within your collection.

Besides all that, I was actually pretty pleased to drop a few quarters in this machine.  I usually regret it, but sleep well knowing I'm still supposing something I still want around.  This time, I actually dig these guys quite a lot, and I don't even like army men that much.  Far from perfect, Real Heroes could actually be a gem to be pretty excited about, especially if this theme really gets your blood flowing.